Hey Reader,

I’ve been coaching since 2009. When I break that down now, it’s 17 years... which sounds insane. I didn’t get my strength and conditioning specialist certification, though, until 2012, so I like to say I’ve only been coaching fourteen years, as those first few years I was, without a doubt, terrible. If I could apologize to clients in that time, I think I would lol.

What this all means is that I have tried just about every fitness trend, hack, and “system” on the block. And trust me when I say that they all go in and out of style.

It’s how I know that there’s NOT one perfect system or style. To an extent, they all work for certain people.

It’s why I despise social media so much. Because listening to people preach about things I HAVE to do makes me ragey. I have to do nothing. What we all need to do is find a system that works for us, our life, our enjoyment, our bodies. And that sh*t changes depending on the season you’re in.

It’s overwhelming to be told that we need to do fourteen things before our first cup of coffee in the morning. It leaves me feeling like I’m failing when I don’t have the exact perfect routine. And if I feel like I’m failing, I sure as hell am not going to do MORE.

So, here are a few things I have started to completely ignore.

WHEN I need to eat.

I’ve been through both popularities now multiple times. The “you should do everything fasted” one and the “don’t do anything fasted; your hormones are a mess” one. Both are valid. I have worked out in the morning, fully fasted, for at least twelve years of my journey and managed to gain a ton of muscle from it.

I’ve also tried to shorten my fast, eat more in the am (this was when I was increasing my running volume), and ignore fasting. Both worked when I needed them to. There’s no perfect answer here, and you can thrive off both. Personally, I find better results when I use a fasted approach, both in my body and in my focus and energy in the morning.

I’ve learned that what you eat as a whole in the day seems to matter much more than the exact timing of the food. So, play around. Keep an open mind.

All or nothing sessions.

Man, did I used to preach this. You’d better be a bucket on the floor of death for that workout to be effective. 100 burpee challenges? Yes. Heavy squats, battle ropes, and a Bosu skip class? For sure.

Me at 39? Hard pass. It’s ingrained that we need to show up or ship out for workouts. That sweat and breathless death matters the most.

You know what actually matters? The ability to show up consistently and get stronger. And to do that, I can’t be sore for 4-5 days after one workout. Plus, I despised Bosu skip class and would use any excuse to get out of it.

At my age, my goals aren’t PR, cool skills, pure baddassery. They’re having enough muscle to look strong, being able to still pick up my 11-year-old as a joke, and being able to do random things with my kids as long as I want. Crushing my body in a workout isn’t part of that (it’s also probably a reason why you’re not seeing results.

Pushing through soreness.

I’ve learned this the hard way (multiple times because I’m a stubborn mule) that when something is “niggling” doing the thing you know is causing it to worsen because it’s “in the program” isn’t going to get you further. It will, in fact, set you back more time.

Your training program can ADAPT. It can (and should) vary based on the day, your cycle, your stage of life. If your back is bugging you from doing yard work and heavy deadlifts and sled pulls are in your program, “mustering through” isn’t always the best option.

Stop thinking you suck for swapping exercises that day or performing lighter reps. Showing up is showing up. And if you want to do that long-term, work WITH your body, not in spite of it.

Wrap Up

There’s more. So many more things I think the fitness world gets wrong (if someone tells me again not to have coffee on an empty stomach, I am going to lose my mind). But just because it’s out there doesn’t make it accurate or the system FOR YOU.